Posts Tagged ‘Prince Harry’

Owen to Man Utd

Amid the financial insanity taking place on the east side of Manchester (have you seen the wages these people are getting?), a 29 year-old signed for Manchester United on July 3rd. A 29 year-old Englishman…

A 29 year-old Englishman called Michael Owen.

Did you see that one coming? I definitely didn’t. 8 years ago, as he single-handedly robbed Arsenal of FA Cup glory and helped Liverpool to a cup treble, the thought of him ever joining his Northwest rivals seemed as likely as Prince Harry serving you in McDonalds. Yet, here we are in pre-season and Owen has scored on his debut wearing the number 7 of Manchester United. I’m going to try and delve into the thinking of Sir Alex Ferguson and look at the potential for the ‘Boy Wonder’ in the current United set-up.

Cristiano Ronaldo’s sale £80m sale to Real Madrid should have automatically put United onto the frontline in the summer transfer war – especially when you consider that the money was paid in one lump sum up front. However, United seem to be playing a different game this summer, possibly bitten by the poor form of Berbatov after his £30M move last august. Ferguson knows better than anyone that big money doesn’t guarantee success (Is it too cruel to mention Juan Sebastian Veron? Oh dear, too late….) and also knows the benefit of purchasing elder statesman (Cantona, Sheringham, and Larsson). But ‘injury prone’ Michael Owen? Surely a team of United’s stature should be looking above and beyond this type of capture. Surely Owen was destined to join Hull City or perhaps Everton. Surely United would swoop to capture Ribery or Benzema. Evidently not. Scratch at the surface though and it this bizarre piece of business has the potential to be a masterstroke…

It’s no secret that United have built their entire side around Ronaldo for the past three seasons and incredibly for a winger-cum-striker he was never injured. As a result, the rest of the team lived to serve him. His responsibility was huge; Penalties and free kicks were all under his control and he was the ‘go to’ man whenever United needed a winner. Its success was huge, Ronaldo scored 66 league goals as United were crowned Premier League champions 3 seasons running. Away from Ronaldo though, goals were not as plentiful as the Old Trafford faithful have come to expect and a lot of their success was down to their defensive strength and the emergence of Vidic as one of the best centre-backs in the world. However, it was always a case of when, not if, Ronaldo would up-sticks and make the move to Madrid.

Ferguson knows that it is now time for other players to shoulder the responsibility relinquished by Ronaldo and for Owen to benefit from the end product. The fluid formation used to get the best from Ronaldo (it can be argued that Man Utd have played without a striker for at least 2 years) would need to be discarded. Avid Spurs fans will tell you that Berbatov was in his element dropping deep and looking for runners ahead of him. The problem at United last season was that when he dropped deep, he often had the company of his team mates around or behind him – not ahead. The mere presence of Owen on the field suddenly makes Berbatov a more dangerous proposition and gives Owen the type of service he craved at Newcastle United.

Ronaldo’s departure also gives Wayne Rooney the opportunity to step up too. Ronaldo’s stellar form has undoubtedly pushed the great talent of English football to the periphery of the newspaper headlines in the past couple of years, yet seasoned viewers at Old Trafford will tell you of a player who has matured but yet still has that incredibly aggressive spark and a huge talent for the game. It seems Ferguson’s lack of transfer activity could be because he believes he already has the replacements bedded in at Old Trafford and that Michael Owen is there to apply the finishing touch.

So will Owen be a success? Only time will tell, but as a piece of business it looks risk-free and Ferguson knows that at the very least he has players around him desperate to prove themselves good enough. I’m predicting goals galore at Old Trafford this season and fully expect them to be the league’s top scorers in May 2010.

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Hairy Plotter and the Half-blood Prince

Like Martin Luther King and Ghandi, I’m a fan of passive resistance; but there are some things in life that we have to fight for. For me, it’s a baby’s smile, the love of a mute woman or more affordable prices at the petrol pump.

It’s to my deep and lasting regret that a serious injury prevented me from joining the military. I’ve been plagued with recurring back pain since childhood – it’s never easy growing up in Jersey.

Fortunately for the army, Prince Harry was able to stand up and fight for possible Grandmother and Country. His willingness to get his hands dirty shows real character; he’s stuck two fingers up to those who question Germany’s poor war record. Fulham’s recent record is at an equally unhealthy level; they’ve only one won of their last eighteen battles. Blackburn will take no prisoners at 11/20.

Now that the Rambo-like tax-dodger has returned from single-handedly destroying the Taliban, he’ll be looking for an alternative career. Steve Coppell is apparently showing an interest; he appreciates a useless ginger hitman. I’ll fire a few rounds off if Reading sneak a win over Manchester City at 6/4.

Radio chat shows are really scraping the barrel for material. One recent topic up for debate was ‘Why do West Ham fans dislike Frank Lampard’. I wasted 25 minutes trying to get through, and I only wanted to say four words. I’ll be equally succinct in describing the 4/5 for a Tottenham win over West Ham: nap of the week.

Michael Owen may have been written off more than Angus Loughran’s debts, but he remains a top-drawer operator. Newcastle are available at 10/1 against a Liverpool side with one eye on the Champions League; I’m ashamed to say that I’m on the verge of being priced in.

Cesc Fabregas returned to his incomparable best in midweek against Milan. I can’t foresee any scenario where Wigan will be able to stop him, shy of hitting him over the head with a guitar or dropping a grand piano on him; but even then he’d remain instrumental. Arsenal just have to turn up to win at 8/13.

Tim Cahill has been castigated for using a goal celebration to show solidarity with his imprisoned brother. I find the criticism over-the-top, it’s not like he bent over and touched his toes – even I would be offended by the ‘Barton shuffle’. I’ll hit the dancefloor when Everton beat Sunderland at 5/4.

The FA Cup reaches the quarter-final stage this weekend, allowing either West Brom or Bristol Rovers the opportunity to make an unexpected trip to Wembley. Personally, I hope it’s the Albion fans who get to see the bright lights of London, as they consider a trip to Birmingham something of a cultural treat. The Baggies are a fair bet at 6/5.

I hope Sir Alex Ferguson has calmed down after Arsenal’s last-gasp leveller against Aston Villa last week. “It was the 95th minute of their usual seven minutes of injury time,” whined the Scot, before launching a furious tirade at the blackness of a nearby kettle. United fans will be steaming when they knock Pompey out of the Cup at 4/11.

The FA should hang their collective hands in shame after overturning Frank Lampard’s red card against West Ham. I can only assume that they were frightened of Lampard demanding a personal hearing, which would have led to astronomical catering overheads. I’ll happily tuck in to the 4/11 for a Chelsea win over Barnsley.

It appears that Lampard was let off on a technicality – he plays for one of the big four. Jeremie Aliadiere represents Middlesbrough, so he was given a four match ban for replicating the actions of a Liverpool player – he regularly underperformed in the league. Boro will still have enough to ease past Cardiff at 7/10.

Last week’s accer never really got off the ground, but even Shakespeare made the occasional spelling mistake. I’m far more confident with this week’s selections. Reading, Everton, Tottenham and Arsenal form a 14/1 accer of such noble virtue, even Prince Harry would happily go to war to protect it – if there was a camera crew in the vicinity.